I Quit! (1/31/20110

*The names have been change for privacy and protection for the people...thanks*

Dear dairy,

I don't know about this... today was just a bad day for me.  I think i have hernia... i guess, i am just a weak guy.

I need prayer real bad for healing.

Well, other than that i am good... only being all worry about having a hernia of some sort!   Having a mess up health is scary.

Today was a pretty crazy day. There is this new patient name LeMarge.  LeMarge just talks and talks but the thing is... none of it makes sense or created a sentence.  So she has not only lost her memory, but also she is very confuse!

This can be a problem for mixing with our group of patients....  we have a different unit for people like LeMarage... well that is how we separate them.  That is why we have different units in this care center, like maybe an ER hospital.  So if LeMarge keeps on staying in our unit, it will only confuse the childlike old folks that only have memory lost.  Most of them just stay away from LeMarge.  LeMarge laughs all the time, and   She did some perverted tongue action during lunch as i told her to drink her milk!  So that is her character.  I still yet to figure out why she acts this way.  Theres is no photos of her in the room.

But for some reason, she really drives me nut.  So i'm trying to figure out why???? Then i realize that i wasn't frustrated with her, i was more frustrated with "how did she come to this stage?"  And it really not about AGE!  As i mention before, it has a lot to do about LOVE from close ones and family.  Family love togetherness is very important.

I just wish their family member would at least come and visit her and the others.  Is just folk-up that people just throw their own parents away and don't even think  back how ...back then when we were babies OUR Parents raised us up? (does it make sense?)... Everyone needs somebody to LOVE  and to Love somebody.  Even friends can help each other out...why not?!  But no... most of us have our own dreams and goal in life.  i just think, it is only fair that we help our parents back, since they give birth to us and plus they raised us up.

As for work....I don't know, i just want to them to be happy...

Well... another new lady moved in a week ago named Guchi#5, she  have a nice great big bed which real coloful bedspreads. and with all these nice picture decorations.  But she is so unhappy and looks real miserable like a helpless child.  During breakfast time, she will just ask us for us to call her son and demands a Cheeseburger or Pizza is fine too... she's a New York-kar.   I at first kind of got irrated with her whinning all day long!!! She just won't listen and just moves around and not pay attention to you like a little child bored shopping with mommy.  i don't really care about all that.... But the problem is, we don't want her to fall... so it was like baby sitting a bratty 10 year old girl.  But then later i found out that her son flew her here from New York and drop her off in our place and went back to New York to work.  And he is the person she knows.... so you know... i feel for her.

Anyways,  please pray for me for healing my hernia and for the patients to have a fun time!


God Bless You!

*The names have been change for privacy and protection for the people...thanks*

Name and Face (1/30/2011 Sunday)

*All names are change for privacy and protection

Dear Diary,

Well, today at the Alzheimer care center was a good day.

Everyone behave themselves and I guess getting to know everyone is a great plus.

Alzheimer should be call "a big baby" disease, cause that's how it feels like, everyone is back to basic in their thinking, eating, moving, and talking. Everything has to retaught to them again!

Yesterday i was quite disappointed with the result of trying to get them to just think. So I started to tell them that my name is John (please remember that!). Funny is that, they all say "okay I will..." and 5mins later, is "huh, do i know your name?" or "i don't know what to do..."
or "Your Ron right?" So that was pretty close.

But today, to my surprise, 3 person still remembers my name and one told me that she only remembers my face and not my name.

So i told them to just focus on ONE thing at a time... "just learn my name and we will learn more later". Like washing their hands. I would tell Barbie to was her hands and she would just pick up her hands but don't know what to do with it... so every morning i would try to teach her to wash with and how to wash in the water. So every little step has to be guided. I haven't work with little kids (in their learning stage) before but i'm sure that is about the same, step by step in learning. (hope this makes sense)

Well... today is Sunday and since most of us that works there are believers of Christ (All different denominations as one) We always put on worship music. Today we played an Elvis version of Amazing Grace and almost everyone sang to it!!! It was crazy! Especially when i saw Molly who wakes up just to pace around the hall ways and go back to bed, she was singing and blessing everyone! It was pretty awesome to see her come alive again... otherwise "she would only be repeating words like "no... no... i can't... i can't...)

Mrs. Rosy, kept on telling me that she loves my Puma and she always ask me "How old are you?" and I would say "I'm 38years old." and she would go "ohhh did time fly by fast!"...
Mrs. Rosy is African American and she is about 80 years old and very healthy, she is tall and energetic and loves to walk, so i ask her, what is her secret diet, she told me she eats everything (like BBQ RIBS!!!), and she tells me that she loves golfing. So i guess that exercise and outdoor activity is a good for health wise.

Mrs. Rosy can carry a normal conversation with you, cause i talk to her about serious stuff like drug abuse and God and music and whatever, she can talk to me about it and have an answer for it. But again... out of no where, she would ask the same questions or repeat the same phrases like "Do you know my son?" "You know i use to work as nurse" "I like your shoes, where did you get those at?" So her brain (mind) can still wonder as she carries a normal conversation with me.

Still have a lot to learn from all them. But i still feel that half of them are TRAUMATIZE by someone or some event! Another thing is self-denial... this is what Rosy told me, she said that when people self-denial they will eventually forget and get worse and worse... since those who are NOT self denial they rather face that there a problem and try to work at it.

One lady Fu-Fu she is 92 years old and she loves to write things down like "i am here" or "This is my room" and any label that needs labeling like Desk, lamp, tv, etc. She is always trying, cause she hates this "god-dammed place" that's what she would say and i agree with her frustration. She can be in normal enviroment and if she keeps on talking to people, and learn new things, then maybe she can get her memory back...

Oh yeah... also our brain in terms of upgrading... is not just about repeating brain tasks like crossword puzzles, modeling ships, majhong, or reading new books... but is about learning new things like something that you never expected to learn... . Like me, trying to figure out Alhzimer is just totally what i never expected. So it is triggering my brain to upgrade something new. Or learning to cook, that is also another thing that i didn't expected to do... i had to learn it becos i needed a job! Or learning a new instrutment like Banjo... i don't know, just whatever that you always wanted to learn... Get the Brain to work differntly and also having a learning frustration is good, becos that means your brain is working and is trying to figure it out.

Again... i am no doctor, but just a dude that likes making toys and happens to need a job and this was the only job that hired me out of 6 other applications... and even though the work is tough, i don't know why i love it!??




*All names are change for privacy and protection

I survived the first week (1/27/2011)

*All names are change for privacy and protection

Dear diary,

Just been thinking and thinking about the folks at the care center with Alzheimer's.

Well... for sure one thing, i know it is not related to smoking weed... cause i have seen videos of old lady teaching us how to make Mary Jane buttery cookies... so that is ruled out. But yes, when we smoke weed, that feeling can be like forgetting things and the brain is just wondering trying to figure out what to do.

I survied my first week at work, it was super tough. I never knew that i would one day be taking care of old folks from brushing their teeth to taking a bath for them and wiping their booty clean.

I think i have stomach craps for like 3 days. And i thought i ate something that was bad and stuff. Well, I did it, and it was tough, but it is a great challenge!

Our brain is like a computer, we need to clean and upgrade it with good things and keep up with time and accepting new things in life. Our brain needs to be working and thinking and learning new things, listening, watching, feeling, so that we are up to date.

I notice most of the patients in our Unit comes from the mid-States... mostly small cities like Arkansa, Iowa, Tennnessee, etc. i don't know, maybe alot of them are homemakers just waiting to do nothing and retire.

Our brain is alive, it needs to be thinking and doing new things (storing new things).

Most of the patients can remember a certain period of time very well... since most of them are around 80's to 90's... they tend to only remember the 1930's music and stuff (which is the time they grew up in). They can tell you every detail there is about that time of their life.

I only been there for a week, so everything is just a guessing theory and idea.

I still haven't yet talk to Rosie (who is a black lady) she is the most normal one there, she knows exactly what i'm talking about. But she does always ask me "if i knew her son Bernie..."

I don't know i feel that i can find a cure and answer for this crazy disease. I think this disease is worst then death, cause even if your healthy, you can't function by yourself. You need someone there to be your hand and etc. like a baby 24/7.

Also, these folks need LOVE, that is very important. I think if we give them the attention they need, like assurance of being safe etc. they feel comfort, since they are old folks... Also we have to treat each Alzheimer person in differnt ways, some we have to treat them like babies, some just like a teenager and some just plan old grandma.

Still have a lot to look into it!!! I'm trying to read all the other Alzhimer's research

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/159442.php

One thing though... i feel that alot of them have been TRAMATISE by some event or someone....

*All names are change for privacy and protection

At the old folks home with Alzhemier Diseases 1/26/11

*All names are change for privacy and protection

Dear diary,

Well.... its been a week of real work, hands-on as Care Giver for Alzhemier folks. It is a pretty crazy overwhelming job, for the amout of pay (minimun wage), and the amout of stress, emotion, and feelings... it can really mess up your health if you don't watch out!

For the first 3 days, i had morning stomach craps for no reason. But once i start to get the routine going, all the stress is gone.

But i still rush and rush all over the place not knowing who to take care of first. Since all the Alzhemier folks are in their 70's to 80 year of age.

Today was a good start, no superviors yelling at me, even though it was a slow start for me, i took care of Unit B, as Judy took care of unite A. And also good thing Jenny our lead was there to supervise, cause she just let me know what i need to do, but not yelling way.

Other then that, the day is good. Same old routine, we wake them up at 6:30am. since they are old folks that moves super slow with Alzhmier, it take them about 2 hour to get to the dinning hall! Plus, some just don't want to listen to you and throw tendrums at you and they forget all the time!

So around 8:30am they eat breakfast and watch the news!... and after breakfast they stay in the dinning hall and we give them magazine to read and turn on some music! Jazz music, since most of them grew up in the 1930s.

None of the old folks are stupid... they just can't remember, and they are like babys, you tell them something, they are still learning and can easily for get. But the funny thing is, they keep REAPEATING the same thing. Like one would always reapeat "What's your name?" and one would repeat "I don't like milk" and another one would repeat "You know my son Arnoald?" so it is the same everyday like a broken record.

well, by 10:30, one of us goes to lunch and one will stay and watch them ... Around that time there is snack. And after snack more music and tv and then lunch. After lunch everyone is tried and sleepy like a baby and they get all tried and some will get grouchy!!!!

Is sad and funny at the same time, causae none of them knows why they are doing there!

But there is hope for this disease, cause there is a cure for everything is just that we haven't figure it out yet.

One thing for sure, i still stand by the theory that our brain is like a computer and like a computer it needs upgrading.... cause i notice most of the Alzhemier folks, they can remember a certain period of time and thing. Like this one lady, i told her my name is Bob, she replys "oh i have brother name Bob" and everytime she would do the same thing when i sayd my name is Bob... alsmost like a broken record or like a computer being stall, hung, and lost in space... BLANK OUT!

Differnt people have different levels of Alzhemier's, some can function better then the others. Some just can't remember people's face and sometimes name. And some have to think for a long time to finish things like eating. Some are so lost in space that they pace around back and forth with no direction to go. Baically we are their hands and feet, so for a skinny dude like me, its time to eat more meat and get pump up!... cause some of them are quite heavy!

Well, also this is a tough job, since many have quit! There are brave soliders, but many new ones have quit! Its tough, the smell, the shit, the yelling, showering... the sadness...
and it makes don't want to have sex anylonmger.. cause an sex organ is just an sex organ
(period)

But good thing... i want to be like Paul in the Bible! hahahhaha

All names are change for privacy and protection